Does The Guilt Of Being A Single Parent, Entice You To Buy Your Child’s Love?

Women Obtaining Wealth Is A Group Of Women That Believes In Their Family, Financial Future, And Community. by Dina Harbour   (1114 KB)
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I was talking to a single mom last week and our conversation went from casual to very personal.  She is a hardworking individual and I made sure I gave her a compliment on all the things she seems to accomplish in a day.

 

Before I knew it we talking about our backgrounds family issues and struggles. But she ended our conversation by saying that her child would have everything in the world no matter what the cost.

 

I understood that she wanted her child to feel just as important as other kinds with both parents. But my question is, if a single parent buys their child everything out of guilt, will that help the child when they grow-up or will it hinder them?

Warm regards,

Dina Harbour, Extraordinaire
CEO & Host of Women Obtaining Wealth
Women Obtaining Wealth Organization
W.O.W. Conversations on Internet Radio, Sundays @ 9p EST
Call-In # for show: (646) 478-5836

Stay Connected to W.O.W. download our customized toolbar today!
Recommend Me!

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Does The Guilt Of Being A Single Parent, Entice You To Buy Your Child’s Love?

Women Obtaining Wealth Is A Group Of Women That Believes In Their Family, Financial Future, And Community. by Dina Harbour   (1114 KB)
Listen on posterous

I was talking to a single mom last week and our conversation went from casual to very personal.  She is a hardworking individual and I made sure I gave her a compliment on all the things she seems to accomplish in a day.

 

Before I knew it we talking about our backgrounds family issues and struggles. But she ended our conversation by saying that her child would have everything in the world no matter what the cost.

 

I understood that she wanted her child to feel just as important as other kinds with both parents. But my question is, if a single parent buys their child everything out of guilt, will that help the child when they grow-up or will it hinder them?

Warm regards,

Dina Harbour, Extraordinaire
CEO & Host of Women Obtaining Wealth
Women Obtaining Wealth Organization
W.O.W. Conversations on Internet Radio, Sundays @ 9p EST
Call-In # for show: (646) 478-5836

Stay Connected to W.O.W. download our customized toolbar today!
Recommend Me!

Posted via email from Women Obtaining Wealth's Posterous Blog

Are You Being "Financially Pimped?"

Being Financially Pumped   Download now or listen on posterous Commentary For Being Financially Pimped.mp3 (1405 KB) I'm sorry if my title is a bit offensive to you but this madness has got to stop! I hear so many stories of young women who seem financially responsible get involved in a relationship with financially irresponsible men. What gives ladies?? This story I am sharing with you is a perfect example of what I consider being "Financially Pimped." Let's just call her "Jane Doe." However this is a very true story. At age 22 Jane is deeply in love with John. So as they build this beautiful courtship he ask Jane to sign 100% for a student loan in the total amount of $50,000 that he will need to finish a school program.  Jane hesitates but he assures her that this is the only way they can build a future together. So in love and hopeful for a future with John she takes total responsibility for his student loan. Now fast-forward 4-years later they are no longer dating. The wedding bells never came their way and she is stuck with him not paying on the student loan that benefited him, however it is also the loan that she in 100% responsible for. So for reasons unknown, John is no longer paying the monthly bill and the creditor calls Jane for the payments. With back payments and late fees she cannot afford to pay. Was she "financially pimped?" Yes!!!! I can say so many things about this "financially pimped" scenario but I won't go into all of that in this blog.  What I do want to say is that a school loan cannot be included in a bankruptcy petition and why someone would take 100% responsibility for a loan that benefits someone else unless it is your child, I do not know.  Please ladies wake-up.  If you were financially responsible why would you risk your financial health for someone who doesn't care about his or her financial future?     Warm regards, Dina Harbour, Extraordinaire CEO & Host of Women Obtaining Wealth  Women Obtaining Wealth Organization W.O.W. Conversations on Internet Radio, Sundays @ 9p EST Call-In # for show: (646) 478-5836 Stay Connected to W.O.W. download our customized toolbar today!

 

Posted via email from Women Obtaining Wealth's Posterous Blog

Are You Being "Financially Pimped?"

Being Financially Pumped   Download now or listen on posterous Commentary For Being Financially Pimped.mp3 (1405 KB) I'm sorry if my title is a bit offensive to you but this madness has got to stop! I hear so many stories of young women who seem financially responsible get involved in a relationship with financially irresponsible men. What gives ladies?? This story I am sharing with you is a perfect example of what I consider being "Financially Pimped." Let's just call her "Jane Doe." However this is a very true story. At age 22 Jane is deeply in love with John. So as they build this beautiful courtship he ask Jane to sign 100% for a student loan in the total amount of $50,000 that he will need to finish a school program.  Jane hesitates but he assures her that this is the only way they can build a future together. So in love and hopeful for a future with John she takes total responsibility for his student loan. Now fast-forward 4-years later they are no longer dating. The wedding bells never came their way and she is stuck with him not paying on the student loan that benefited him, however it is also the loan that she in 100% responsible for. So for reasons unknown, John is no longer paying the monthly bill and the creditor calls Jane for the payments. With back payments and late fees she cannot afford to pay. Was she "financially pimped?" Yes!!!! I can say so many things about this "financially pimped" scenario but I won't go into all of that in this blog.  What I do want to say is that a school loan cannot be included in a bankruptcy petition and why someone would take 100% responsibility for a loan that benefits someone else unless it is your child, I do not know.  Please ladies wake-up.  If you were financially responsible why would you risk your financial health for someone who doesn't care about his or her financial future?     Warm regards, Dina Harbour, Extraordinaire CEO & Host of Women Obtaining Wealth  Women Obtaining Wealth Organization W.O.W. Conversations on Internet Radio, Sundays @ 9p EST Call-In # for show: (646) 478-5836 Stay Connected to W.O.W. download our customized toolbar today!

 

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The Post Holiday Blues- Going Into Debt All In The Name Of Love

Women Obtaining Wealth
Women Obtaining Wealth Internet Talk Show

The holiday season is always a bittersweet time for me. As a Financial Literacy Coach, I often get an overwhelming amount of new clients towards the end of January beginning of February in panic mode. The stories all start out like this, "I spent way too much money this year.” How did a holiday season that is suppose to celebrate love, family, and friendship turn into a time when people feel OBLIGATED to buy things they cannot afford?
I am so thankful that my parents taught me that giving love, time, and gifts is a year-round sentiment. They also never made me feel obligated to buy them gifts during any particular holiday season.
Each year I watch children scream and demand various toys for their parents to buy and each year there is a "hot" toy that every child must have. The sad thing about it is, their parents rush stores sometimes pushing and raving to buy these items that they know they cannot really afford. So what do they do? They pull out credit cards, skip a bill, and borrow to get this toy that will be set aside the next time something new and improve comes along.
I recently returned from visiting my family for Thanksgiving. Now this holiday seems to be celebrated in a fashion that I can agree with. When I returned I went through my pre-recorded news programs that were recorded while I was away. Sadly a news reporter described how a man that had no prior criminal record attempted to rob an armor truck outside the mall in my area. His behavior led to shots being fired, people being hurt, and being thrown in jail. His wife refused to be interviewed and I sat there in horror. My family and I visit this mall often. It terrifies me to think that this man felt that having money during this holiday season was worth this vicious act. How did you SPEND the holidays? Do you have the blues?

By:
Dina Harbour
Financial Literacy Coach

Controlling the Environment In Which You Dream

Women Obtaining Wealth
Women Obtaining Wealth Internet Talk Show



In listening to an interview on one of my many mentors, I heard him talking about the importance of controlling one’s environment. I found this fascinating because I felt such a strong desire to move away from my immediate family and start over in another state where I barely knew anyone.

While he was speaking I realized that I used my move to control my surroundings. I felt that the people and things that I was encountering on a daily basis were toxic. My job was draining my creativity because more and more I had to conform to management standards of operation and procedures. Even when I tried to introduce more effective procedures (what I was hired to do) they were reluctant to implement the changes. It was like fighting with your parents. Who do you think is going to win?

Other visual and personal things were going on as well. So I decided that a change in scenery and career was what I had to do. Leaving a “good” job and the security of close family and friends are not easy but sometimes very necessary for growth to occur.

In bringing in this New Year, I hope you take a moment to examine your environment. Look around you. Are you watching too much negative television, chatting too much with friends about negative issues, hating your job? Try making changes to your life that will lead you in the direction of your heart and your purpose. The journey is truly rewarding.

By: Dina Harbour, ExtraoDINAire
Financial Literacy Coach

A Place To Call Home -Why Single Mothers Should Own A Home

Written by: Dina Harbour

Women Obtaining Wealth
Women Obtaining Wealth Internet Talk Show


I can’t put my finger on it exactly but it is something special about going home. A home can represent a lot of things but for me, home is my security blanket. It is the place that I grew up, ran up and down the street, learned how to dance, skate, and ride my first bike.

My parents bought out home shortly after I was born. My Mom still lives there to this day and it makes me smile. Buying a home is something I always wanted to do. It just made sense to me. It took me 31 years before I could buy a home. Why did it take me so long to purchase a home when I wanted one so badly?

Well, no one taught me how to buy a home. I was employed and made a decent salary but I didn’t know all the rules and/or requirements. When I did find out what was required I hadn’t saved up enough money for the down payment. Plus I was carrying to much debt.

Later in my discovery I learned that ALL wealthy people own real estate. Most Millionaires make their money from buying, renting and/or selling this asset. It took me 31 years to own my first piece of property and it was the best investment I could have made back in the year of 2000.

Since then however, I’ve experienced and learned so many valuable lessons about owning real estate. Because of my knowledge, I became a Real Estate Agent and Investor. Also, in sadness I’ve watched good people loose their homes while the housing market took a crazy dive.

Regardless of these unfortunate situations people are still using real estate as one of their most popular vehicles to building wealth. They have the REAL information needed to make real estate much more than a home, but also a pertinent asset. Just because the economy is not in the best shape doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t own real estate. People still need a place to call home more so now than ever before. Do you have one to call your own?

How To Check Back-In, When Your Mind Has Checked-Out

Written by: Dina Harbour
Women Obtaining Wealth,W.O.W. on Blog Talk Radio (Every Sunday @ 6P EST)

I can remember back when I was living in California how my mind would just temporarily checkout. I would be driving my long commute from Long Beach back to Los Angeles and I would not remember driving to my exit. Scary-huh? It’s true I was driving (safely) but my mind was somewhere else. Miraculously, I would snap to it just before my exit and would literally “thank God” that he was watching over me.
Has that ever happen to you? Can you remember a time when you were so burdened with life’s daily task, demands, and/or responsibilities that you just mentally checked-out? I knew in my heart that I had to make some changes in my life, but I keep putting them off. It wasn’t until I lost two brothers, two months a part that I knew I could not continue to live life as I did before. So at the end of that same year, I sold my home and by January of the next year I had moved to a new state, a brand new home, and started life totally “checked-in.”
It’s not easy to make changes, especially drastic ones like I did. I lost the comfort of a “good job”, and distance away from the only place I’d ever known as home. I even lost communication with a lot of my associates and friends, but my gains were so much more valuable than all my losses combined. Fear usually tells us a different story, don’t believe him. Make sure you’re mind is checked-in today and that you’re living a momentous life.

Have a purposeful day!

The Blame Game

Sponsored by: Women Obtaining Wealth- Dina Harbour
Women Obtainin Wealth &
W.O.W. Talk Show (Every Sunday @ 6P EST)

It amazes me the large number of women that choose to continue the journey of the “Blame Game”. I understand that many of us didn’t have the things we wanted growing up. I myself went through a car fetish in my twenties because my mother refused to buy me a car in high school. But as I grew into my womanhood/adulthood I had to take control of my decisions and try to educate myself about things I didn’t understand from my past.

With Women Obtaining Wealth we talk with our members and help them get through various obstacles that might be hindering them from pursuing their passion. I’ve noticed however, that people are comfortable repeating and living the “blame game.” I think what happens is that as long as it’s someone else’s fault for their misfortunes, they don’t have to do anything to heal themselves and move forward.

I’m not saying that outside circumstances don’t affect our lives. But what I am saying is that once something affects us, what do we do? I myself try to find away around it and this has served me well.

If you’re living the “blame game”, stop and redirect your thought process. Write down the cause of your blame and release it so that you can move beyond the anger, pain, and/or disappointment.


Now step up your game and be a winner!

Motivation vs. Inspiration

I try to meet new people daily because I am in the business of "connecting people with purpose”. Sometimes I have a brief conversation with people but often it turns into a somewhat deep/lengthy discussion about purpose and passion.

This is how I explain what I do and/or believe in. “I do not try to MOTIVATE others.” Motivation is temporary and it often requires some type of outside reward such as money to help a person stay focus. However, INSPIRATION is a long lasting feeling. It is a wake up call to something that is already inside of you. Regardless of money or fame, you can be inspired. When I am pursuing my passion/purpose I cannot give-up totally because something inside of me keeps me going.

So I leave the conversation by saying this, “if you’re living this precious life only using motivation (i.e. getting a paycheck, buying a nice car etc) and not using inspiration you are cheating yourself from a felling that wealthy people experience everyday. The joy of living a purposeful life is a life worth living."

Dina Harbour, CEO
Budgeting & Money Management Coach
www.womenobtainingwealth.com

Do Business Owners Know The Difference Between A Good Product vs. Good Service

Recently I have been encountering a problem with business owners. The problem I have been noticing is that they seem to feel that if their product/service is good, needed, and/or desired their customer service doesn't really matter.
-huh-

Well on one occasion, I returned an item and the owner of this store explained to me that he could not refund my money because "all" of the product wasn't there. On another occasion, a business owner commented that she has been in business for over 5 years with strictly word of mouth, so she felt confident that her product was worth my inconvenience. You see I had heard about her cakes and wanted to desperate pick one out for my birthday bash this year. I went by her store on Christmas Eve, they were closed. No sign on the door no store hours. "Oh, well", I said. "It is the day before Christmas."

So anxiously, I returned on January 2, 2008. The holidays are over -right-? Nope, the store was closed and again no hours on the door. I called the phone number. The recording confirms the days of operation. I was there on a Wednesday after 2:30 p.m. I left a message. They were supposed to be open per their recording.

The next day I get a call from the owner. She quickly defends her lack of service. "My cakes are the best", she says. -hum-

Now I have a choice on how I want to spend my money. Do you buy products and services from companies with terrible service, but good products? I don’t!

Check out my last “Powerhouse Roundtable Show”
www.blogtalkradio.com/womenobtainingwealth

Thanks
Dina Harbour, CEO
Women Obtaining Wealth
www.womenobtainingwealth.com

The Importance of Creating A Realistic Budget

I was interviewed on by AASAP radio by Alonzo Brown. He asked me a very important question, and I rushed to respond. His question was "What task could you give someone looking to start the budgeting process?" My answer was this.

When you are trying to generate a realistic budget, the first thing you should do is keep all of your receipts. Take a plastic container or shoe box. Keep it in an area that you see everyday. I recommend by your front door, bedroom dresser, or kitchen counter.

Every time you spend money on ANY item, make sure you keep that receipt until you can drop it off into your designated "box". Continue this process until the end of the month. At that time take out all the receipts and write a category on them. For example, a cup of coffee could be given the category of snack or food.

Total all these receipts and think about if these items are out of control or not.
To learn more about creating a household budget, send me an email on our website's "Contact US" page and I will send you a Newsletter on the subject.

Happy Budgeting

Dina Harbour, CEO
Women Obtaining Wealth
www.womenobtainingwealth.com